when an old piece of clothing doesn't love you anymore...
My cargo shorts from my tennis days don't fit me anymore! I haven't worn them in two years, but they refuse to button around the waist AND allow me to breathe and eat.
Horror! Shock! Disbelief!
I'm the sort of person who has clothes from Year 9 and they still FIT. I probably ever only had one growth spurt, which brought me just over 155cm tall, and then cruelly, stopped.
Need to go shopping for new shorts (haha, you thought I was going to make a resolution to exercise more! Well, maybe. Someday) and swimmers 'cause a friend of mine is having a pool party and my current swimmers in their big-patterned swirlyness make me look like a 70s tragic.
Horror! Shock! Disbelief!
I'm the sort of person who has clothes from Year 9 and they still FIT. I probably ever only had one growth spurt, which brought me just over 155cm tall, and then cruelly, stopped.
Need to go shopping for new shorts (haha, you thought I was going to make a resolution to exercise more! Well, maybe. Someday) and swimmers 'cause a friend of mine is having a pool party and my current swimmers in their big-patterned swirlyness make me look like a 70s tragic.
posted by Donna at 17:00
140 Comments:
You think that's bad. I went from a size 32 to a 36 overnight...
'overnight'
what did you do? sleep for like 4 years?
lol
dammit Brit!
if i was drinking milk it would have shot out of my nose!
and i would of said, anchorman style:
"Milk was a bad choice."
remember at the beach when we were talking about simpsons and i was like my fav is when bart first goes to school and makes milhouse laugh and milk shoots out of his nose. how cute was that? and then you go 'i hate hate hate the one where the damn dog needs surgery!'
HAHHAHA...sigh
i should really just call you and talk to you instead of littering donnas blog with 'remember when i said and then you said' kind of crap
lol
yes maybe you should call....
donna, do u mind?
lol
I don't mind at all ... haven't watched Anchorman yet though people are telling me that i'm seriously missing out.
best line ever: where did you guys get YOUR clothes from? the...the...the toilet store?
NO IT'S NOT!
the best line is:
MILK WAS A BAD CHOICE
and no buts about it, and donna you're not missing out too bad the first 40 mins suck its the last 40 that really kick the movie into high gear.
hey mary, lets make this like totally THE MOST that anyone has ever commented on donnas blog
Okay i will accept said challenge.... but only if you answer these questions three:
a) is it REALLY hard out there for a pimp?
b) are a whole lot of bitches REALLY jumping ship?
c) do you know the song these lyrics are from?
.....GO!
yes
no
no
if i were a bitch, i wouldnt jump ship.
Three 6 Mafia: 1
Martin Scorcese: 0
OMG!
I love that Oyvind's joining!
LOL
omg i'm the 13th comment....is that bad luck? will it even post? let's see...
PHEW!
yes it did post....that was close...
It's OK everyone, I've explained Øyvind's comment to Anna...
LOL
thanks ferris
yes, thank you santa's little helper
now what does 'Come here girl, go head be gone with it' mean?
did you listen?
mary im bored and hungry and hot because i wore pants today. i knew pants were a bad idea!
are you people still here?! hahaha.
Anna, last time I visited your myspace your username had part of 'Sexyback' in it ... and then I had to go find the song straightaway and listen to it!
"Come here girl, go head be gone with it" is obviously a typo - it should be "Come here girl, go ahead be gone with it".
It still doesn't make any sense... but it's Justin, so who cares?
Jeffery is correct the lyrics are:
"Go ahead, be gone with it"
i just looked them up and on this site:
http://www.lyricspy.com/161995/Justin_Timberlake_lyrics/Sexy_Back_lyrics.html
thats what they said the words were.
but guys, more importantly, does it matter what his lyrics say, or is it the message that he drives home of we should ALL bring sexy back? Because lets be honest, when sexy was out, we were all like 'why be like that for?'
and btw. Britt, your line should've been:
"It's so hot today....pants were a bad choice!"
the bag that i really like is made out of brad pins. can you believe that? was kind of moron cheap ass makes a BAG!!! out of brad pins. its like make the foundation of my house out of toothpicks.
i was wondering why it always broke.
BTW how do you spell 'jeffrey?' like jeffrey? or jeffery? or jefferey? or jefferreyy?
or or or or! jefferrii?
dude you're like spinning me out, its another 'what came first the chicken or the egg' question.....
and why the hell are you talking about a bag made out of brad pins....and what the hell are bred pins? Pins made by Brad Pitt?
Of course you know the main problem with Justin Timberlake's music?
"Not enough cowbells". There, I've said it.
The chicken had to get laid before the egg could...obviously
Øyvind PLEASE!
Don't do the 'chicken or egg' shit.
Everyone knows that dinosaurs were around way before birds, and they laid eggs.
Therefore, eggs came first.
HAHAHAHAHAA
the chicken had to get laid...
brad pins are those with the split so when you pin it to something you bend the splits and thats how they stay there - go to lincraft mary go to lincraft. brad pitt sucks ass, so he probably DID invent them.
OH, NO, YOU DID NOT JUST OFFEND MY HUSBAND!
YOU'RE GOING DOWN BITCH!
[IT'S ALL IN CAPS BECAUSE I'M SCREAMING]
dont you go hyphenating yo name ho!
look donna its another celebrity non-event. donkey kong who posted on mine was soo much better.
'scene 2, shot d-d-d-d-d 2d-d-d... take d-d-d-d-2...'
and then the gold was when she came around after shot 2D and she goes 'I think the D really messed me up'
dude
did u just offend Angelina? I wouldn't go doing that, that bitch is crazy, just ask Donkey Kong.
*roar*
I don't know what Mary is talking about, it was all just a misunderstanding.
I accidentally spilled my drink on her dress at an Oscar after party and she bit my nipple off.
I don't know if that makes her crazy....maybe just uber-kinky.
Sincerely,
DK
*roar*
I don't know what Mary is talking about, it was all just a misunderstanding.
I accidentally spilled my drink on her dress at an Oscar after party and she bit my nipple off.
I don't know if that makes her crazy....maybe just uber-kinky.
Sincerely,
DK
god donkey!
i thought we put that all behind us. i was in africa just before the oscars and you know what its like there with the no food and shit. so i got a little hungry and bit you. What the fuck are you whinging about you big gorilla?! what did you need nipples for anyway?! you're not a woman like me!!! that's right i said it! im a woman!
SHUTUP!!!!!!!!
Look.
Let me just get everything straight. I asked Angelina to bite his nipple off.
You see all the tabloids get it wrong, it's not her that's kinky, it's me. And when she did it i was hiding behind the pot plant across the room filming it for you tube.
And if you're interested just click the link below:
[LINK REMOVED FOR CONTAINING HIGH LEVELS OFF INAPPROPRIATE MATERIAL]
*roar*
OMG. That was you?!
yeah...it's just...just something that i couldn't get from jen. she's so pretty but angelina, my little angie is strong like a man.
im sorry donkey.
maybe when i have my next wife we can brunch? yes?
*and when i say brunch i dont mean eat your other nipple. i mean, i will buy food with my millions of dollars and you can bring a guest if you like.
*roar*
Okay, but without my missus, she kinda liked that nipple more...
Sincerely
DK
Dammit Donna, a lot of famous people visit your blog!
oh, the missus. how is she? we havent chatted since my little man angie pulled her fur. is it better? it grew back right?
oh btw. i was going to tell you in our christmas newsletter but since we're friends again i might as well share now. i dont do so good in the movies anymore, so what i did was invent these pins. they're called brad pins. genius no?
I know this may sound stupid, but what does LMAO stand for anyway?
and what the fuck does WTF mean anyway?
Laugh My Arse Off...
actually Jeffery, it's
LAUGHING MY ASS OFF...
GAGF!
so thats how we're spelling jeffrey now?
ok thats hott.
pray tell what GAGF means.
you know someone said LOL the other day. like said it to my face.
why be like that for?
Did they say 'lol' or spell the letters out?
GAGF? Go And Get F@#ked!
they said it.
i said 'something funny'
and then he said 'lol'
the worst thing was that just before this accused me of running like a little asian girl.
he accused you of the truth?
because you know you ARE Asian and kinda short, so saying that you run like you are, kinda pointless...
and this whole 'lol' this thing, like, um, just laugh.
Fucking retard....i'm already NOT looking forward to meeting this retarded friend of yours, hopefully i haven't already, and even more hopefully, i never will....
'lol', honestly, really:
WHY BE LIKE THAT FOR?!
its dave mary.
dont fall asleep or gretel will come and take photos of your ass dave.
Dave.....Dave.....
DAVE!!!!!
Why be like that for Dave?! I thought you were cool!
...well i guess i've been wrong before, i mean there was that party where i introduced Angelina to Donkey Kong, don't even think about asking what happened next.....
omg donna! you hit 50! thats ridiculous.
can you imagine when we're all 50? good golly. i dont care how westie it is, you all still have to come visit me in my trailer on the side of the highway. i'll even go out special and put straws in your cups when you come over ok?
yes, even YOU jeffrey!
yeah, YOU'LL invite us, but what about your trailer-mate, Keya. Will she welcome us, as creed would say, "with arms wide open"?
hahaha, creed. laughing at them on so many levels.
of course she will, if not i shall plan a special job for her that day. so call before you come even though we may not have a phone.
ps. this is totally scary, where are you? how come 2 seconds later you've replied to my comment?
Let's see. When you guys are 50 I'll be... oh, fuck...
Oh, that's right, you will be, as the French say "oh, fuck"....which means - because you've been invited over and it would be rude to knock back her hospitable kindness - that you'll have to get your head cryogenically frozen. Then one of us will thaw you out and bring it over with us, i vote not me, because seriously, why would you ONLY get your head frozen? Why not get your ENTIRE body frozen, cause then you could just WALK over yourself, and not be forced to bum rides off of everyone.
oh yeah! like in that forever young movie. god that was a waste of my life, and his by the looks of it.
and i also thought about it - keya wont be living with me i dont think. she has her job at esprit...
"that you'll have to get your head cryogenically frozen".
I've looked into it already. They don't make the tubes big enough.
freezing? hmm...what does that pacifically entail?
and maybe you can freeze something else that will fit into the tube.
As I've already said, the tubes aren't big enough.
And now for the 60th comment.
well actually yours is the 59th because a comment of marys was repeated earlier.
so THIS is actually the 60th
oh no, dont bother frantically searching through, just know that im right.
Why should I trust you? Your family doesn't even trust you to use the oven...
ahem...firstly, i believe that it was the microwave that blew.
and secondly, FULLY offended by your lack of support in my housewife skills.
is it just me, or are Jeffrey and Britt suddenly entering married couple fighting territory?
and yes it is true, a comment of mine was repeated earlier....but i still wouldn't trust you to make me a fruit salad....not even if it was Chinese New Year.
LMAO
It's just you.
get your facts straight before you go around accusing people of entering married couple fighting PLOISE!
you are no longer invited to the trailer for microwaved food.
Assuming that the microwave's been fixed by then...
this whole thing is just me, you(mary), you(greg), you(jeffrey), you(brad), you(donkey kong) and you(angelina) thinking that we're clever. isnt that strange? why have donna and oyvind stopped? do they even look at this or is donna desperately trying to think of more things to blog so that this post wont be on the front page anymore?
anyway, reality aside...
I'LL MICROWAVE YOU!
69
70
71
72
73
74
*roar*
75
Sincerely
DK
YAY!!!!!
Its working again, the server must have been down or something!! I wondered why the comment limit would be something random like 73, i mean why would 73 be the limit? Why not a round number like 75, or a million, or 7.....
you know what this means right, there MAY be a limit which means, we have to make every comment count! here i go:
So... succinct. Couldn't have said it better my...
heres another succinct comment for you jeffrey:
if i catch you counting anymore im going to come around while you're sleeping and take photos of your underwear and post them online and make people give me money. you know i can because the bus goes to your house mary! its only a short walk from the stop to your HOUSE!
why should they give you money you saY? because i will title them brad and angelina.
so the point of this story is DONT COUNT ANYMORE!!!!!!!! it gets me all excited because i think that there is another comment when there really isnt!
who says pictures of my underwear aren't already on the internet right now?
....thats put a little dent in your plan now hasn't it?
Who says I wear underwear?
yes, huge dent in plan and other things...
do you think we can make it 1000 boys and girls? i was going to say 100 but aim high no?
Why stop at 1000? Let's see if we can break this 'internet' thingy.
Break the internet you say..... i like the idea of that!
Here's to BREAKING THE INTERNET!!!!
and yes Britt, of course, we can make it to 100, we're already @ 82. Lets just see how quickly we can get to that 100, then we'll move on to the challenge of 1000.
Here's a comment to get things moving:
Is going "commando" only inclusive of not wearing underwear, or does the term also apply to not wearing a bra?
This post will probably leave the front page in about 4 posts or so. Good luck on breaking the internets!
Oyvind's in Wollongong at the moment methinks, so probably thats why he's not posting
no i think its no undies. i like to think that ive never gone commando and if we start throwing bras into the equation then all of a sudden it gets tricky.
thank you btw, for announcing to the whole bar the other night that i dont wear bras.
well maybe next time we're in a bar i can announce:
HEY EVERYBODY ANNA'S GOING COMMANDO!!!
and then we'll see the entire bars opinion on the whole 'do we include bras in the equation or not'
commando is inclusive of bras, face it britt, you've gone commando.
You're like my good friend Arnold Schwarzenegger, except for him "going commando" was making a kickarse 80's action flick.
hey
ive gone commando commando too you know. when i was making that T3 movie, my muscles got tooooo big so i couldn't wear undervear...didn't you watch the first scene? god angelinaaa, i always watch your movies!
Remind me, what was this post about again?
Well EVERYONE knows i go commando.
...need i say, TROY.
commandos? or as AJ from biggest loser would say comMANdo.
and milk
and pins
and how weird it is that you slept for four years straight.
fun fact: did you know that drew and hugh sing their own songs in music and lyrics?
are you as horrified as i am?
that is SOOOOOOOOO how she would say it....i haven't watch a single episode this season, how is it, are fat people still loosing weight?
...but more importantly, has AJ lost weight...honestly sometimes i'm like, AJ take a hint from the show!
*roar*
WAY harsh!
sincerely,
DK
Has anyone else been going to 'The Biggest Loser' live shows yet?
They're on every lunchtime at Marrickville Metro Shopping Centre.
yeah AJ's weight is a little hard to ignore but she is speaking better this year. but i dont appreciate these new trainers. i want bob.
i was in the NBC store and they had red and blue sweatshirts for sale but i couldnt decide which to get so (thank the good lord) i got neither.
and jeffrey, are you serious?
Yeh I'm serious.
How else do you explain all the fat people at Marrickville Metro?
Britt....seriously, you didn't get that? *inhales and exhales deeply at friends....how to say this nicely....lack of judgement*
Nicely? Allow me:
Britt you're an IDIOT!!
...and earlier Britt, Jeffery asked what the POST was about, not what the comments were about, so you summing up the COMMENT conversations is just plain WRONG!
*roar*
I've said it once and i'll say it again.
WAY harsh!
sincerely,
DK
oh
well F%&K youse all! i get 100!!!!!!!!!!!
100!!!!!!!!!!!
and...100 again.
100 isn't that big a deal.
70 was the one, whoever rolled that one over is the shit.
'The shit', not 'A shit'
you see i told you we'd get to 100 easily!
Now the next target is what, only 897 comments away.
which means more topic starters, which you two aren't really helping with! I mean the point is that you respond to the topic in question then either segue (into another topic or just outwrite pose a question.
[You should have seen me try and spell segue, at first i wrote segeway, but a red line came up under it which meant that it was wrong and then i went into Microsoft Word and typed it up and then right clicked it and Microsoft word kept telling me that perhaps i was trying to write seaway, and i was like NO MICROSOFT WORD I AM NOT TRYING TO WRITE SEAWAY!!!! And then i kept trying different spellings until no red line...]
sooo, i guess my question is:
If men are from Mars and women are from Venus, which planet does Hilary Swank come from?
Uranus. At least, she'd like to.
MONKEY LAND!
*roar*
hey!
why be like that for?
DK
Who am i?
*looks up*
Oh, that right!
*reowr*
no, i can't do it like donkey
*ROAR*
No, no you can't. So don't even try.
Sincerly,
DK
my boss is david brent. he actually said to me 10 minutes into my shift 'anna, this desk is very untidy. it's really all just garbage isnt it? you can throw that in the bin can't you? so it doesnt look so much like a brothel.'
he said brothel.
brothel.
if i were any pruder than i already am, i could be easily offended by that sort of language.
what's a brothel?
it's sort of....customer service slash entertainment venue.
yeah, that's what ive been told
brothel.
brothel.
he actually said brothel.
cause when you think rubbish on table, you think brothel....
i cannot believe he said brothel to you, how would he even know that you would know what a brothel was, you know since you're a girl and all...and girls aren't dirty.
that's very true, girls aren't dirty.
dude i believe you actually said 'girls ARE dirty'.
oh god, the second i get paid im buying that box set and not going to uni anymore. if i dont go, it can't hurt me right?
I know what i said, not just what you think i said and remember:
"Those of you who think you know everything are annoying to those of us who do."
look that was a little harsh, here's a few words for you to hang in there at your new job.
What does a squirrel do in the summer? It buries nuts. Why? Cos then in winter time he's got something to eat and he won't die. So, collecting nuts in the summer is worthwhile work. Every task you do at work think, would a squirrel do that? Think squirrels. Think nuts.
Me, when I think of doing anything, anything at all, I say to myself, "would an idiot do that?".
And then I do it.
Sorry I misquoted.
“Whenever I’m about to do something, I think, ‘Would an idiot do that?’ And if they would, I do not do that thing.”
I like the sound of you dwight. clever but not afraid to admit when he's wrong. i assume you are a he?
mmm....
but i think you should so all things dwight. like try out for american idol sometime. lord knows we need more people with interesting names like kel-lee and paris and jhadrivintra from last year.
Dear random blogger
It has come to my attention that there have been rumours circulating about my sexuality.
So i have devised a brillant idea. I shall visit every single blog on the internet [there can't be that many] and correct these rumours.
I am NOT a homosexual.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
I'm just not.
Seacrest Out!
...
Hetro-Seacrest Out!
arent i a clever hunny bunny? what i've done is combine my own name so its like brangelina (yoohoo! i see you too sweets).
anyway hetro, stop writing to everyone in the known universe and pay a little more attention to me.
HEY! YOU"RE OFF TOPIC!
what topic are we supposed to be on?
btw the deli in your favourite marrickville metro is owned by one of our friends and active supporters of the biggest losers.
hey guys we're getting dangerously close to being off the front page...
is anyone tired of this post?
it's sort of annoying to have this on my mind like the minute i wake up and the minute i go to sleep and all the minutes in between.
show of hands for gracefully leaving before we are kicked off the front page...
alls i can say is:
Quitters never win
and
Winners never quit
I sticking my finger down my throat at Mary's last comment...
Jeffery, i don't know what people have been telling you lately [you know Kate Moss, Bronte] but bulimia is not cool.
YAY!!!! i totally got to be the last comment on the front page!!!!!!!!
Score!!!!
and you thought comment 70 was "the shit"
So 130's it, huh?
imagine when we're all 130!!!!!!
we'll be DEAD!
it's a bit random but i'm gonna get it out there:
when i die, please dont let them take my organs. i want to be selfish until the very last minute.
Yes we will all be dead...
...except for Jeffery, who of course, will have his cryogenically frozen head living on forever....
ha ha ha ha ha... remember that one, back at comment 55, well guys we've hit comment 133, you know what we have to do.
Any long series does it, quite frankly I'm surprised it's taken us this long....
bum, bum, bum [dramatic music]
A CLIP SHOW
For some reasons the words 'jump' and 'shark' have popped into my head...
in the words of great men:
A licky boom boom down.
When did I SAY THAT?
hey lovers,
i was chatting to beyonce the other day, just having a little chat over some beer (?) and she thinks that this has fizzled fo shizzled out.
first of all i do not drink beer! and secondly i do not say "shizzled", that is an African American stereotype and i resent that, consider our little chats over!
listen booty b, with an atti-TUDE! like that you aint winning no friends. im going now, to chat with Jhud, which might i add, is a very very unfortunate nickname
140 yahhh!
And now it's over...
its not THAT unfortunate.
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